My sister is special. Allow me to explain.

Last year, when she turned 30 Some Unspecified Age, she was all fired up. She was so gung ho, in fact, that she rounded up about 10 of us for a birthday bash in Las Vegas. Turning 31 Some Unspecified Age + 1, however, must be entirely different. The laws of birthday physics apparently no longer apply when you reach the age of 31 Some Unspecified Age + 1. As such, at dinner last night we were instructed that today (her actual birthday special occasion) was not to be referred to as her “birthday”, but instead as a “special occasion day”. (In related news, in a recent scientific survey of a group of one guy named Jon, the majority strongly felt that from this day forward I should be called Captain Kickass.)

The bakery even made her an “Occasion Day” birthday special occasion cake:

Anyway, Happy Birthday Special Occasion Day, Sis!